It's a BOY! :o)

There it was on the screen, and later printed out, to be kept in a baby scrapbook . . . the one part that made my baby inside of me, a boy. I was happy, but also shocked and mortified at the same time. I have no idea how to describe how real it all suddenly felt when I realized I was going to be a mom to a son. A son!

I don't know why, but I always thought of babies and children as predominantly female. Oh wait, I know why. It's because I was thinking about life from MY perspective. Up until this point, my life had basically revolved around ME and served ME. From then on, I would view the world from a completely new set of lenses- with my life revolved and wrapped around the raising of my child.

3 littly boys, 9 1/2 years, and a divorce later, I sometimes feel like I'm trapped in the twilight zone, but being a mom really is the best job in the world. I've enjoyed looking back on the insanity of trying to nurse, the craziness of toilet training, the "somebody just shoot me in the eyeball" moments of grocery shopping mid-day with kids in tow. For the present, I still stumble along, wondering if I'm doing anything right at all, but pressing forward anyway, because even though I don't know what I'm going to do in the future, all I know is I'm not moving backwards!

So, here's a blog. A chance to vent, to purge, to question, to entertain, to brag a little, and to connect, because I know I'm not the only one out there who feels like life as a parent is sometimes just a little crazier than I think I can deal with. And then, suddenly, the mood changes, or the kids fall asleep for the night, and something within me softens and tugs at the heartstrings and I can't think of anything else I'd want to do more than to have another day with these kids.

Oh, and sorry for the mom's and dad's of little girls, I don't have much experience with bows and tutu's and glitter wands lately, but I hope you stick around and read anyway, because who knows, you might be able to relate- and I hope you do. <3